The Big Brother VIP Hotel is open for business

The Big Brother VIP Hotel is open for business
PHOTOGRAPH BY NIGEL WRIGHT. WRIGHTPHOTO1@MAC.COM BIG BROTHER VIP. S1 2021 THIS PICTURE SHOWS: EPISODE 1 .

Big Brother rolled out the red carpet tonight and finally welcomed his 12 VIPs to the ultra-exclusive Big Brother Hotel, but the glamorous arrival of his debut guests wasn’t without some five-star glitches. 

Luke Toki, Caitlyn Jenner and Imogen Anthony were invited to sample Big Brother’s luxe penthouse suite, but when the penthouse lift went haywire, the trio found themselves escaping into a tiny room where everything was half-sized, leaving the VIPs unable to stand completely upright or lay comfortably on their beds.

Downstairs, Big Brother’s heating was on the fritz and a faulty door had locked the remaining VIPs out of their bedroom. To apologise for the rough night, Big Brother treated the VIPs to a sumptuous breakfast of their choosing, only to tip the impressive buffet into a garbage truck right before their eyes.  

Settling into their new home for the next 22 days, the VIPs wasted no time opening up about their lives, with Thomas Markle Jr. claiming he stood by the infamous letter penned to Prince Harry in 2018. Thomas said begging Harry not to marry his half-sister Meghan was 100% honest and heartfelt, “Meghan treats her family like she’s embarrassed of where she comes from. She’s very selfish, self-centred. I think she’s very shallow. You’re never that too good for anybody, ever. It’s rude to treat people like that.”

In the half-room with Imogen and Luke, Caitlyn recounted the sheer decadence of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s 2014 wedding: “The dinner table was at least 100 feet long. White marble. Then you start looking for where you’re sitting … instead of a name tag, they engraved your name into the marble. 

“I’m looking out across the whole city of Florence and I said, ‘this is absolutely gorgeous’. I said ‘what I need is Bocelli’. Finally, Kim comes walking down this very long walkway, all the way to where we are at the bottom of the hill and what do I hear? Bocelli. And I’m thinking, this is perfect,” said a stunned Caitlyn after realising Andrea Bocelli was standing right behind her, singing live.

“It was a very cool wedding, great attention to detail. Kanye was very, very good at that. I like Kanye. I get along very well with Kanye. He was certainly out there, but he was always very, very good to me.”

As the winner of Big Brother’s first challenge, Ellie Gonsalves chose to rescue Caitlyn from the half-room, much to Omarosa’s disappointment. “Out of the three people, the last one I wanted back in the game was Caitlyn. Caitlyn is going to come gunning for me because Donald Trump has been very angry since I came out against him politically. Caitlyn Jenner is trying to curry favour with Donald Trump. He knows how I play the game. He knows how I think strategically, and I’m sure he gave her a political briefing on Lady O before she came down here.”

Caitlyn and Ellie accepted a high stakes secret mission from Big Brother to rescue Luke and Imogen from the half-room undetected by their housemates. A successful mission means controlling the game moving forward, getting caught means they’d automatically be up for elimination.

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