Big Brother gets Political

In what was a world first for Big Brother housemates have gone to the polls.

Confined in complete lockdown for 47 days (including 10 days in lockdown prior to broadcast) with no access to media and the influence of the outside world, Housemates were today informed of the forthcoming federal election.

Big Brother announced, “Housemates, Big Brother has some news for you. News that affects all of you. One month ago, Prime Minister Kevin Rudd confirmed the date of the Federal Election… Australia goes to the polls this coming Saturday. “Voting in the Federal election is your democratic right and is law.  Big Brother has made the necessary arrangements for your voices to be heard.

“Housemates, Big Brother has set up a polling booth in the Diary Room where each of you can cast a postal vote which will be sent to your respective electorates.  A representative from the Australian Electoral Commission is on hand to help with any queries you may have.  Shortly, Big Brother will play you a message from the leaders of the three major parties as well as the Palmer United party, and then give you some time to consider.  Big Brother will not be asking Housemates who they voted for and you are under no obligation to discuss your decision.  Once your vote is cast, it will remain sealed and stay in the ballot box.”Big Brother said.

 

Taking a reflective view addressing gay marriage, refugees and the environment, Senator Milne said,”Let me tell you something about myself.  I’ve got two boys, 27 and 29, one’s gay one’s straight.  I want to be at both of their weddings.  I think other mums like me feel just the same.” She also went on to say, “I’ve been an activist all my life, I went to gaol to save the Franklin River… and I’m now asking you, Housemates to help me.”

 

Taking the opposite approach to the Greens, Clive Palmer’s delivery was dominated by issues of economy, tax and revenue raising.  Mr Palmer said,”The main issue is not which individual becomes PM, but what Australia can do to regain its status as a Lucky Country…  Governments may rise and fall, Prime Ministers may come and go but ideas go on forever.”

 

Choosing not to address any party policy specifics in his personalised message to the Housemates, Tony Abbott took a more casual approach. Mr Abbott said,”You guys are pretty lucky because there’s an election campaign on and you’re missing it… still I’m not going to miss the chance to say a few words to you about giving Australia a better government.  I’m a volunteer bush firefighter, I do a bit of surf lifesaving, I’ve got my daughters here with me because to be honest as with all parents, they’re our best asset…  If you want to know who to vote for, I’m the guy with the not bad looking daughters…”

 

Offering a pre-produced message as part of his campaign, Rudd chose to deliver a serious address on his stance on gay marriage. Mr Rudd said,”To marry Therese, to promise to love and support her, and for her to promise the same to me in front of our family and friends, was one of the most happiest memories in my life… if you support gay marriage I will need your support for this election.”

source 9

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