Wake Up Executive Producer Adam Boland has opened up about his mental health battle.
In a very emotional piece written for The Hoopla Mr Boland recalls what happened on Melbourne Cup day that saw him take time off from the show.
It was Melbourne Cup day but for me, the only thing racing was my mind. I lost focus and perspective. My new partner watched me in the studio control room that morning and thought I had no control at all. He was right. He took me home as soon as the show was over. I then spent the day pacing, rambling and even fitting.
That night, the paramedics did what they could to calm me down. It wasn’t their fault, but some of their actions backfired. By the time we reached hospital, the bright lights were hurting my head and I had no sense of where I was or why.
That was the start of two weeks of deep depression.
The anxiety attacks were daily – in fact, sometimes hourly. They were also exhausting – but sleep wasn’t an option.
This happened at the precise time my show needed its leader. My partner tried his best to keep me away from social media and wayward headlines. When I did see them, I felt a deep sense of guilt. I would scream “I need to be at work” before again landing on the floor. I didn’t feel safe anywhere. I would move from the couch to the bed to the floor and then back again.
In the article he thanks his employer for understanding an closes with some good news.
I’m no longer scared. I’m no longer down. I feel “normal” and am keen to return to work next week. I have a clear head about where I want to take the show (more newsy, for those interested) and most of all, I again have perspective.
The full piece can be read here. It truly is powerful stuff.